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One of the big issues that affects companion animals is boredom. It may sound trivial but it is a pretty big deal. When an animal is bored and/or lonely, just like humans, this can lead to depression, lethargy or destructive behavior. As with anything else, always remember that animals have rich inner emotional lives, like us. We adore our furkids, but the reality is that many of us have to work outside our home at least five days a week, 40 + hours. This means that when we get home, exhausted and only wanting to eat and sit on the couch, kitty (or dog, rat, bunny etc) has been home alone and is in desperate need of attention and playing. You have a whole life/career outside the home, they only have you.
From your cat or dog’s perspective, the reason for needing to play is twofold: 1. They want to play for fun, to alleviate boredom and because there is an instinctive desire to chase, hunt, scratch, dig etc. 2. They can sense your energy and want to elevate your mood, they want to engage you in an activity that will lighten and help you as well. From an energy perspective they are more aware than most humans. When you consider what your cat needs, think about/research what a cat (even a big cat, like a lion) does in the wild. They have social interactions, they run, they hunt. Obviously indoor kitties don’t get to really “hunt” except maybe an occasional insect, but this is where environmental enrichment comes in. This is a concept that is regularly used in zoos and other establishments where wild animals are kept in captivity. The goal is to create an environment filled with activities that replicate what they would want to do in the wild. It is well worth looking it up online and/or buying a few books about it. (I am researching books now and will post in my “recommended books” section soon.) For example, we recently purchased these little robotic insect toys that are battery operated, and our kitties go wild “hunting” them. They stalk them, chase them, throw them in the air and basically do all the things they would do if they had captured live prey. This satisfies a very deep instinctual need. When our first cat sons were older, I noticed sometimes they would want to play before eating, in a way recreating the natural order of hunting before devouring their food. Some cats like running wheels (like the wheels traditionally seen in hamster habitats, but big enough for a cat.) Because our animal companions are very intelligent (remember intelligence should never be measured by human expectations) even interactive play should be challenging and adapted to your furkid. For example, dangling a ribbon for my cat son gets boring for him after a while, and he prefers the ribbon to disappear under something, like a pillow, so he can dive under it to retrieve it. There is no “one size fits all” method of play. The ideal is to spend enough time with your animal and try different things in order to see what they respond to. There are also things you can do when you are away from home, like leaving treats hidden in places for them to find (there are treat dispensing toys too.) It is also wonderful if possible to adopt two (or more) animals instead of one so that they have each other for companionship while you are away from home. Dogs also have strong instincts that shape their preferred method of play. For example dogs that love digging can be intellectually stimulated by hiding treats in areas of your garden where they are allowed to dig. (this will save the plants you want to keep, too.) Some dogs love to play fetch and others need to play in water, in which case you can provide a kiddie pool and sprinklers. Be careful if they eat their toys to supervise this so they don’t ingest anything dangerous. Dogs need to walk and/or run daily too, preferably with their people, or with a dog walker if you don’t have time everyday. Both dogs and cats feel a need to be in sunshine and nature. This is easier to provide for dogs if your cats are indoors only, but there are still options. Cats can have outdoor enclosures (catios) or temporary screened in play pens. Some also like to go out on harnesses/leashes or in cat strollers. At the very least provide open windows for fresh air (with strong screens so they can’t fall out.) I focused on cats and dogs, but all companion animals need this, whether you have rabbits, birds or rats. Animals that live in cages need even more one-on –one time outside their enclosure to combat boredom and depression. Part of being a great animal parent is to provide for their emotional happiness as well as their physical safety and health. Please make sure to allow time to play and to enrich their environment. They will understand if sometimes you simply are very busy, but in that case talk to them and tell them when you will be able to play. For example:”I’m sorry I have to type up a presentation for work right now, but in a few hours, when I finish, we can go to the park.” Most importantly, when you do this, always keep your promises.  I have said before that one of the amazing things about animals is that they do not hide their emotions, unlike people. I often mask my emotions because I would not be able to function in society otherwise. I firmly believe that a positive outlook and expectations are key in promoting animal welfare and I know those who read this are exposed to enough difficulty, but I also feel like it is important to acknowledge the complexity of navigating a world that is still debating whether animals “feel” when it has always been a fact for many of us. Perhaps you already knew as a child and never forgot or maybe a very special companion animal taught you.
We live in a society where people might casually tell you they plan on exterminating animals (that they consider pests) at a cocktail party. In the next breath they excitedly talk about the cutest sweater they just bought for their beautiful dog that you know they adore. As you walk around the event where there may not be much to eat if you are vegan/vegetarian, pretending you already ate, someone else may proudly tell you that they just made a donation to a charity that aims to cure a disease their loved one died from. You know that particular charity funds horrible animal experiments & testing. It is not simple. What do you say? Do you simply smile? What is the kind thing to do? The person who donated money most likely has no idea about the animal testing, and if they are grieving maybe it would be best to not say anything at that moment? What if they know and don’t care? If they are a close friend would that affect how you feel about them as a person? What about the people planning on exterminating? I always try to educate about humane alternatives, but that doesn’t mean they will follow my advice. Sometimes they do, and tell me so and that’s a win. Sometimes five or ten years later someone reaches out because something I said or did influenced them to make a kind decision toward an animal. That’s still a win. Maybe they took the spider outside in a Tupperware container instead of killing it needlessly. Perhaps they used humane traps and convinced their neighbors to do the same. Maybe they started reading labels on cosmetics and buying cruelty-free. Win. But it is not easy. It is never easy being the only person in the room who cares if a cockroach gets squished. (I take them outside if I see one-even if I’m at someone else’s house.) It’s not always easy being the only person in the group who refuses to watch a movie where an animal gets hurt. Even though I know it is fictional I still don’t want to see it. It’s especially offensive if it is presented as comical in the movie. I have a sense of humor, but not when it comes to making light of that. It is not easy hearing that someone you know/work with thinks it is funny to shoot bb guns at squirrels. The blatant cruelty that is casually spoken of in all kinds of different situations is deeply unsettling and can be overwhelming. I am very comfortable with and proud of my sensitivity and connection with animals. I do my best but I am still affected by coming across some of these situations, and it is very important for me to have a space where I can simply “be.” At my home and in my garden I can drop the masks that I always wear walking through the grocery store or when I go to social gatherings. Once home, I take a deep breath and I am able to leave it all outside and re-charge and continue visualizing a world where we see animals as equals through love. All animals. I hold the vision and imagine it and this allows me to continue focusing on all the positive strides that are being made. I love helping people understand their companion animals. It is a privilege to connect with animals and it helps me stay optimistic because I meet so many people who truly love their animals and fully consider them family. Hopefully you are able to drop your mask at home too. If you are not, because of relatives or roommates, try to find a place where you can go to be alone, ideally somewhere in nature. Imagine an energetic bubble around you, in your favorite color, protecting you and allowing you to remain connected with animals while navigating anything you encounter in public. Reach out to others that feel the same, even if only online. Follow websites/blogs/pages that report all the wins that are happening for animals. Protect your feelings, they are precious. Don’t let anyone tell you it is strange or wrong to care about the wellbeing of animals. All animals. Where ever you are in the journey, please be proud that your heart knows the love of an animal, or many animals! Whether they are alive or have crossed over, the love you share (or have shared) is forever and it makes you strong. During these cold winter days, I have been posting reminders about making sure bird baths don’t freeze (or thawing them if they do) so that wild life in the garden can have access to much needed water. Almost everyone loves having birds in the garden & the cuteness of chipmunks. Not everyone appreciates the incredibly beneficial and misunderstood Opossum. Opossums, more commonly referred to as Possums, are sadly considered to be “pests” by many. The first time I saw a Possum in real life was shortly after we moved into our house. I heard a noise outside and I saw this incredibly beautiful creature standing on his hind legs eating from a bird feeder I had recently installed. It was a full moon and his fur looked silvery white, it was almost glowing. He looked like an angel to me. After this lovely sighting, I did research and discovered that they are marsupials, they are crucial to maintaining balance in the garden and, contrary to public opinion, they have a very high resistance to rabies, and rarely, almost never get infected. (All this information & more is readily available online posted by reputable wildlife/animal welfare organizations.) No one seems to know exactly why they rarely get rabies, the Humane Society of the United States posts on their website: “People often mistake the open-mouth hissing and drooling behavior of opossums as a sign of rabies. However, this is just a bluffing behavior that opossums use as a defense mechanism and does not indicate a sick animal. In fact, rabies is extremely rare in opossums, perhaps because they have a lower body temperature than other warm-blooded animals.” (http://www.humanesociety.org/animals/opossums/tips/solving_problems_opossums.html) Possums do not seek out confrontation, instead choosing to “play dead” if threatened. If they somehow end up in the garage you can lure them out with food, ideally fresh fruit. Do not push them with a broom, this will scare them. Possums are sweet, peaceful animals who are simply trying to survive in a very hostile environment. Humans are their greatest threat, and they are often killed in the name of “pest control.” An important part of taking care of our earth starts with how we treat our back yards (or front yard-any land we are responsible for.) All the creatures living on our land are interconnected and crucial pieces of a larger “web.” Possums eat insects & slugs, moles (who also are considered “pests”) aerate the soil to keep it healthy, bees pollinate, etc. I believe anytime there is a “sighting” of wildlife it is a gift. I take it as a moment to appreciate that I share our garden with these beautiful beings and welcome the opportunity to help them out by providing fresh water. I want to share one other possum sighting that I will always remember. It occurred a few years ago in the middle of the night. I heard very loud sounds on the deck, almost like a person stomping. I woke up my poor husband thinking we had an intruder. When we turned on the light, there was a frightened baby possum running around on the deck, searching for his family. My husband returned to sleep and I sat there by the glass door watching with Juneau, both of us enthralled, for a very long time, to make sure the possum would be ok. At one point she yawned and it was so adorable! Eventually a sibling came to get her and they went to find their mom under the deck. Juneau crossed over later that year and I am grateful to have this memory of us having shared this moonlight baby possum sighting experience.  Photo is a little bit dark,
(I didn't want to frighten her with flash) but this is the baby possum Juneau and I watched that night.  Happy New Year! As we begin this new year, many of us make resolutions and set intentions for positive changes, big & small. I continue to envision a future where we transcend species and see animals as equals through love, and one seemingly small change that keeps coming to my mind has to do with language. Words hold energy and our language includes the outdated use of referring to animals as “it.” This implies non-sentience and equates them to property. A very simple change (if you don’t already do this) is to never refer to an animal as an “it.” Use “he” “she” “they” or their name/species if unsure. Even if incorrect, “he” or “she” is better than “it.”
When talking with our companion animals, consider the language you use with them. Sure, they may not appear to care if they are referred to as “dumb” “jerk” or other negative words, I’ve heard this often said in loving & affectionate tones. Again words carry their own energy, and remember, animals truly do understand everything we say. How would it feel if your parent/loved one called you “dumb? “ even if they said it sweetly & then hugged you? I’ve heard many loving parents of animals say that their fur kid is not especially bright. This is unfair because it is a judgement based on human standards of intelligence. If you asked a human infant (or adult) to track someone through the woods based on scent it is unlikely they would succeed. I also have observed how a kitty glows happily when her parents call her beautiful and some dogs appear to literally smile when their human companions brag about how smart or sweet they are! I know a cat that likes to be complimented on how fast he runs! These changes may seem small or insignificant at first, but they can make a lovely difference for our companion animals and eventually for all animals as we move towards language that defines them as equal to us & as the sentient beings that we all are.  During all the holidays this season, it is important to take into account how our companion animals will be affected by the changes in our routines.
For those of us travelling, please keep in mind that animals do get lonely and miss us when left at home alone (cats) or in boarding situations (dogs.) Usually dogs are better off because they need someone to walk them several times a day, so they receive attention then, but they will still miss us. Make sure you always ask/hire a trusted caretaker. It is also nice when dogs can stay with friends or family who have dogs they get along with well, but only if they are comfortable with the all the animals in the host household. There tends to be a misconception that cats are perfectly fine if they are just left for several days (or longer) with enough food, water & fresh litter in the box. This may be sufficient for their physical needs, but they also have emotional needs. Try to have a trusted person come to check on them at least once a day, ideally someone who is familiar with your cats and the type of attention they need. Especially if you have a single cat, he or she will feel very alone without you and depend on the daily visits to stay positive emotionally. Even if they don’t snuggle or “play” much with the caretaker, it helps them to have someone visit & talk to them, for at least 25-30 minutes, longer if possible. You can also telepathically/energetically check in with your animal companions while you are away. Picture them in your mind, send them love and talk to them the way you would if they were in front of you. Remind them that you will be home in __amount of days and not to worry. Even if you can’t “hear” them they can usually receive your message and that is comforting for them. Before you leave town always explain where you are going, for how long and reassure them that you will return. If you have visitors for the holidays, especially large groups, think about how that affects your animal companions too. Try to have their food bowls in an area that does not have much foot traffic. Having someone they do not know well standing in front of their food (or water) may deter them from it. If you have indoor-only kitties make sure guests know to never leave an open door unattended. Never assume that anyone automatically knows to do this. If your dogs like to greet guests enthusiastically that is fine. Simply warn the guests in advance and be grateful that you have such a friendly dog. Don’t send the message that your dog is doing something wrong. They are simply doing what they feel is their part to be welcoming & most likely genuinely excited to see/meet your guests. If it really creates an issue or goes on for too long simply & without reproach re-direct their attention with another activity. If you have older dogs or cats that move slowly make sure guests are careful not to accidentally bump into them or step on their tails. If you are having a very large party it may be safer to confine them to an area of the house where most guests will not go, like a bedroom. Try to check on them & always let them know what is going on. Setting expectations is a great way to make sure everyone is comfortable and happy. Protecting the comfort of your animal companions in the home you share is key and your guests will have a wonderful time with the understanding that they are helping you keep your fur kids safe and knowing all are equally valued members of the family. This in turn allows you to be calm & to focus on hosting & enjoying a fantastic gathering. Happy Holidays!  I had a dream last week about the subject of today’s blog post, and in that dream I was dictating this into a recorder so that I wouldn’t forget to post it. The topic addresses my continuing series on dealing with grief after the loss of animal companions.
I was thinking about how our animal companions have much shorter lifespans than we do. The 14-15 years that I was graced with having Juneau and Jarvis here with us, I somehow managed to be a little bit in denial that someday they would cross over. Of course some part of me “knew” it would happen, but it was a “far off in the distant future” concept in my mind. When Jarvis was diagnosed with cancer in 2012, it shook the foundations of my world, a world where I believed I could always protect them & keep them safe. This was something I had no control over. It was past the point where treatment would work. I was able to give him healing Reiki energy and medicine to keep him comfortable, but ultimately his wishes were to simply enjoy the time he had left. Less than a year later Juneau also got sick & followed his brother across the rainbow bridge. As we enter a third year with our beautiful kittens Gracie Belle and Merlin, I have noticed that sometimes I experience a sense of “energetic overlay” where I am very aware that our time is limited. Hopefully limited as in “20 + years limited,” and of course there are no guarantees, but I am more conscious of time. I have to be mindful not to give in to fears of losing them someday, and instead focus on the only thing we have control over, which is now, today. Today I can make sure to indulge Gracie Belle when she wants me to stay in bed longer for an extended snuggle, smiling as she purrs, today I can play for an extra few minutes with Merlin even though I am running late already, and watch him smile as he chases a ribbon toy. I can treasure each second we spend together and be fully present when they need me. Of course there are lots of times when we simply sit together and maybe they sleep on my lap while I read or watch tv, but when they ask for attention they get it. Because even as I am grateful for each minute, I now know these are finite. I think once we have gone through that type of loss & grief, it takes an extra dose of strength each time to adopt again, to start over, in a sense, knowing that the end result will be the pain of separation. But it is not about the end result, it is about all the days & hours in between, no matter how many we are lucky enough to have. About lives shared & lived fully together. About memories and love that does last forever & transcends lifetimes on earth. And I have found the best way for me to deal with that is to remain in the present as much as possible, grateful for the sweetness, every single moment of it. *The hawk in the photo was perched on our garden gate the day we adopted Gracie Belle & Merlin, in the morning before we went to the adoption event. I thought it was a lovely sign.  This week I would like to talk about what it means to be strong hearted.
Those of us that are very sensitive to animals and to nature often get referred to as soft hearted or tender hearted. Usually by well-meaning people but sometimes it can also be perceived as a veiled insult, sort of implying that it is overly sweet or childlike to care about animals and nature. In fact, I believe that it is the very opposite of that. It takes great courage to be aware of the suffering that many animals endure and the way nature in general is treated by people and to still allow yourself to have an open heart and to lead a normal life carrying the burden of that knowledge. An open heart is a strong heart, this means that you are able and willing to carry the burden of understanding and feeling an animal's pain and to help in any way that you can. There are so many wonderful people who do stand up for animals every day and do everything in their power to save as many as possible. This can be done literally by rescuing lost or abandoned animal companions, or by educating other people about animals being equal to humans, or by advocating for the safety of animals in the wild and the preservation and restoration of their habitats. Sometimes it is as simple as refusing to buy cosmetics (& other products) that have been tested on animals, there are so many cruelty free options available that there really doesn't seem to be an excuse for continuing to ignore that issue or not paying attention to the labels on products. I could go on and on, but the main point for this week's blog really is coming back to the idea that by caring for and loving animals (and making every effort to help them) you indeed have a very strong heart. This does not mean that your heart is hard, but rather that you are willing to be open to animals and their experiences and your love for them makes you strong. So next time you get called soft hearted, perhaps you can gently educate the person you are talking to and explain to them why that means that your heart is very strong. And you are strong hearted enough to bravely advocate and care for animals and to show others that it is ok to open their hearts too.   https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=VWKjT3dJUVs
I am thrilled to have been invited to speak with Jamie about how to make animals feel more comfortable in their homes. Please check out the link above-it is about 3 minutes. Lola, the sweet dog you see in the photo, does a fantastic job of conveying what we were talking about too! Jamie's website is: http://withloveandlight.com/  Our animal companions help us stay healthy in so many ways. If you are fortunate enough to share your home with one (or more) you probably already know that as soon as you walk through the door and are greeted by kitty purrs or a wagging tail (or whatever yours does) the daily stresses start to melt away. Animals can read our energy perfectly so they always know when we need them. They typically try to console human parents when we are upset and will go to great lengths to help/heal us.
Last week I was stressed out and my daughter Gracie Belle, who is not typically one for sitting on laps for long, sat with me for two hours until I was very calm. I didn’t want to get up because she was so cozy & comfortable on my lap, which of course led to her accomplishing her goal of helping me relax. My son Merlin purrs and snuggles me under the covers every single night before I fall asleep, it is more calming that any sleep medicine could ever be. He gives me the sweetest looks when he wants to be picked up & held. Your dog may be asking to play, but her goal is at least in part for you to receive the benefit of playing too. Same with wanting a walk, or a break from work. They can plainly see when you need to stop what you are doing and clear your mind. Some animals will go as far as to reflect back to you what is going on with your health. They may engage in anxiety type behaviors that mirror their person’s situation. After you have consulted their veterinarian (always check with the vet first to rule out/treat illness) it is helpful to consider what is going on in your own life or home that may be the cause. Is your animal companion over- eating out of boredom or stress? Over grooming is another typical stress related issue. Are you ignoring your own health? Maybe they are trying to “show” you what is wrong. A lot of us worry more about taking care of our animals’ health needs than our own, and that is great except that we are so very connected. So part of caring for your fur child is taking care of yourself to ease the burden for them of having to “show” you. Of course there are health situations beyond our control, but we can do our best - for us and for them. Let’s listen to them and pay attention to what they are trying to tell us & sometimes simply be grateful to have a sweet fur kid to lick our tears and give us healing purrs. *The photo above is of Merlin giving me the sweet look that makes me stop whatever I'm doing and snuggle with him* 
One of the things that happens when you are sensitive to animals and understand that there is no hierarchy and that we truly are all equal is a realization that this applies to all creatures. Even those that are sometimes considered "pests" by society instead of "pets." I took this photo of a lovely domestic hairless rat as she was being fed by her human mom. I love this photo because it shows the trust between them and the vulnerability of the sweet rat girl as well as how well taken care of she is. She is being spoon fed a delicious treat and she is surrounded by her toys. The way she is holding her paws/hands is so touching! I would like to help shift some of the perceptions about rats.
The mere mention of the word is enough to frighten some. Yet I know several wonderful people who have rat fur (or fur-less) kids and I have also had amazing communications with these rat kids. I have also communicated with wild ones that live outdoors. They are intelligent and unique individuals who are trying to survive, find food, shelter and raise their own children in a mostly hostile environment where people try to kill them as soon as they are spotted. They feel the energy that is directed toward them and it saddens them. They are normal outdoor wildlife like squirrels, chipmunks or rabbits. They are a natural part of our environment. It is not necessary to welcome them into your home, but please at least consider that they are intelligent emotional sentient beings just like our own cats & dogs. The best way to encourage them to stay outdoors is to use small mesh wire to cover any openings to your basement and to avoid leaving food out at night right by your home. If you leave any food out at night for any reason (and this will attract wildlife of course) it should be a bit further away. If they have gotten in because there was no wire barring the openings, there are humane cages to trap them and release them unharmed, like the cages we use for feral cats to help colonies with TNR. Please never resort to cruel and unnecessary "pest control" methods. Rat populations will not get out of control as long as the environment is healthy and there are natural predators like barn owls around. Please be kind. Kindness always makes a difference, even to the smallest creatures. |
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